The SPYCat Portfolio
The most elite team of felines ever herded together.
About
This is a sampling of cats I've assembled from across the globe. Each cat was chosen for his or her unique special skills and collectively they form the best feline response team in the SPYCat world. They are like NAVY Seals... except they're cats.
Below you will find the secret dossiers on such infamous felines as Mr. Peepers, Kittles, Stewie, Psycho, Java, Tweek, Smokey, Bandit, Chippy, Kiwi and Milton.
They're not too big and no job is too tough for this highly trained team to handle. They're almost like the Wonder Pets®. But again... they're cats.
Portfolio
Mr. Peepers
Not satisfied being stroked by just anyone, Mr. Peepers is in search of an evil genius with plans for world domination.
Special Skill: fluffiness
Code-named: Cotton ball
Kittles
As comfortable up in a tree as she is underfoot, Kittles never misses a chance to stalk a bird, mouse, or small child.
Special Skill: invisibility
Code-named: Kit-Kat
Psycho
On a heavy regimen of Haldol and Thorazine, Psycho suffers from excessive FOMO and is therefore, a master of observation.
Skill: astral projection
Alias: Psycho-matic
Java
Her discreet ability to attack from above leaves subjects in fear. No use looking over your shoulder - you'll never know what hit you.
Skill: atomic pounce
Code-named: Miss Pounce-a-Lot
Chippy
Her powers of seduction will mesmerize. Do not stare into her eyes unless you are willing to give up all your secrets.
Special Skill: hypnosis
Code-named: Ms. Thaang
Tweek
Born with an innate ability to hear sounds from multiple directions at once, Tweek simply rotates his ears to hone in on his prey.
Skill: RADAR tuning
Code-named: Tune-up
Milton
A graduate of F.I.T. , he can reboot your laptop, wipe your flash drive, or shutdown without saving by simply walking on the keyboard .
Skill: cyber intrusion
Alias: k4t-tastr0phe
Contact
If you would like to hire the K-team (K for Cats Kats), please fill out the accompanying form.
Be sure to indicate the details of the mission and which cats you'll want to participate.
Lastly, please tell us what you are able to pay. The cats take payments in mice. Please use the slider to indicate how many mice you'll be providing.
Requirements
All missions require that the cats have some key necessities in order to perform at their best. This includes:
- Cat toys
- Catnip
- Litter box (along with daily scooping)
- Daily petting (1 hour minimum)
- Patch of sunlight or window sill
(to meditate on mission objectives)
Disclaimer
We assume no responsibility for chewed plants, sharpened claws on furniture, or "missing" pet birds, lizards, or rodents.